First and foremost are people on Twitter. Seriously. Shut the fuck up. Having a Twitter isn't your personal permission to display your jackassery for the world. To be fair, I am a foul-mouthed asshole on Twitter sometimes. One thing I'm not is ignorant. Anyone can see we're fucked because we re-elected Obama and everyone knows Alabama fans are insufferable low-lives. Twitter had just made those two groups, along with others, twice as bad.
Another little nugget I just discovered is Tumblr. I had seen it a few times from Stumbleupon and I thought it wasn't half bad. About two weeks ago, a close friend of mine texted me a novel of a message that I thought was really cool. I thought it was cool because it was written by Fall Out Boy's main songwriter, Pete Wentz. Since yall may not know, Fall Out Boy is my favorite band. Feel free to judge. A little of me is stuck in my tenth grade angsty identity and I still enjoy the music. Here is the message I received. (Special thanks to Helen)
Now that's cool in my opinion. A little borderline on the Myspace side of things but whatever. After seeing this my curiosity about Tumblr was high so I went over to check it out. What I found was a clusterfuck of things that I assumed died with Myspace. Don't get me wrong. Some of the stuff is cool, but alot of it is over simplified three to four line quotes with simple backgrounds. Not that simple is bad. Shit, I would kill for some simple. However, let me show you a few gems and how I see things.
That's cool I reckon. I like when people stick it out through the hard times as well. Just seems a bit odd to put it in a picture. Doesn't it go without saying that resilience is an admirable qualilty?
It seems like it would be a bit more productive to put "Things I Should Work On" as the heading of this list.
#ShitIveNeverHeard
I usually just drink.
It won't work because I'm mayor of the friend zone. It won't work because "It will ruin the friendship." Well damnit the friendship will be over sooner or later if I finally get the balls to admit to myself that someone else in the world can make me happy. I don't believe anyone else can make me happy. Wait, is that the one reason it will work? This picture just mindfucked me.
Yeah no shit. Try it for year after year. I don't have enough fingers and toes for how many times I've watched this happen.
I don't let go. Making this little number twice as annoying. I don't let go. I guess what makes things like this burn me is when I see people who seem to be oblivious to others and post this stuff. I've felt the way these pictures and quotes describe a million times but I guess I just thought it wasn't worthy of writing down and putting online. Seriously. I look at one person's Tumblr and I'm like "Damn. Are they all this bad?" The answer is that in all the images I saw on Tumblr, that person's and a shit ton of randos, yeah they are mostly that bad.
If this doesn't all add up I'm sorry for how random it seems. Things just get to me. If you read my last post you will get this, I had the drug again on saturday night. Trust me people, the drug doesn't mix with alcohol. One minute everyone is chilling by the fire and the next I'm damn near crying telling someone everything I think before I even know I thought it. Everyone has feelings and some bastard decided to invent alcohol so we could vomit those feelings into the lap of the person we're in love with and hope to hell they don't think "Well fuck here he goes again."
The deepest thoughts are meant to stay deep. Because the second you let them go to the wrong person then every bit of power you had is lost. You're leverage is gone, and saving face is no longer an option. You can play cool when you see them and act like shit is normal but they know now. You told them what you held down for six years and they are free to do with it what they will. Maybe it will get held over my head and I'll get taken advantage of like times before. Maybe they can play it cool and get on with their lives without you because its pretty goddamn obvious that getting on without you is easy. These are all things meant to stay inside. Things that should only be shared when the time is right. The problem is that whiskey doesn't care that she just started dating the 43rd person since you've told her you loved her. Whiskey wanted the words out and whiskey got its way.
I guess the reason that Tumblr jumped all over me is this. I went six weeks without speaking to her and thought I had it made. I had started talking to other girls and thought maybe I could pull this off. The sad fact is that I can't pull it off. Call me weak if you want. Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic. Reality is a bitch and the bitch of my reality is that no matter how much time has passed, I will come back. I can delete her number but I will never forget it. I can burn the pictures but if I blink I will still see them. The bitch of my reality is that I can't make myself stop before I get the shot that I know I deserve.
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